Hangover, What Hangover?

Let me preface this blog post by saying this... I realize what you're about to read is going to make me sound like a binge drinker, however I have complete control of myself when drinking and I'm pretty much a certified genius when it comes to hangovers. Tis all.

About a month ago I was at home on a Friday night... laying low, staying sober and watching one of those weekly nightly news shows that do stories about murders and crazy random things. Well, TG I was watching that night because a story about a miracle hangover prevention patch came on. Ladies and gents, I give you: ByTox. Literally one of the best things that has come into my life in quite a long time. ByTox is a small patch that you put on "a hairless part of the body" (took those exact words from the package - slightly disturbing) before you start drinking. You leave it on while drinking and continue to wear it for an additional 8 hours after drinking.

ByTox was invented by a doctor, and is just a constant replenishment of vitamins going in as you drink them out. SOLD. Even better... it works! I've used this patch twice and both times I have pushed my drinking to the limits. Call it a binge if you must, but I was just having a blast in a glass #SueMe. I should have been puking my guts up throughout the following day because, quite frankly, that's how it goes when I'm hungover. I know to always have Gatorade in the fridge and a bed, couch, and toilet as close as possible. Not anymore, friends, not anymore. It's all about the ByTox. I realize this is starting to sound like an infomercial, but I promise you no one is paying me to hype this new miracle hangover prevention patch (although I'd make a great spokesperson).

If you're ever hungover you need this. I'll admit I was sketchy at first, but when my girls are hungover and I'm downing a bloody mary at brunch I will laugh and continue to get rowdy.

take it or leave it: I watched 2 movies this weekend, Moneyball and 50/50. The fact that I watched not 1, but 2 movies is a minor miracle because I find it pretty hard to sit down for 2 hours without talking or doing anything but staring at the TV. When I do watch, I usually fall asleep. Sad, but true! Good news: both movies were very good AND I didn't fall asleep (huge win for me)! I highly recommend watching both flicks. And if you have a soul, you're going to need kleenex for 50/50.

Ball So Hard

8am-5pm, 5 days a week... Work, workout, eat, sleep, and repeat. Sound all too familliar? In the mundane weekday routine I try to spice things up at work... keep the mood light... crack a few jokes... just have a little fun every now and then. Most of the time that means a rocking out to my Pandora TLC station or wandering around from cube to cube for some chit chatting. I work hard, get my work done, help others, and do my best not to bug others while they're hard at work, but I literally cannot sit in one spot all day staring at a computer screen and talking to strangers. I will go bonkers. Straight up bonk-to-the-ers!

So, because going bonkers is not an option I recently decided that while I'm stuck at my desk (making that money flow) I might as well make it a little more interesting by sitting on a big ass silver workout ball. That's right. I'm sitting on a ball. The main purpose of getting this ball was to go from hunchback of Notre Dame to phenomenal posture. I've heard good things about sitting on a ball... good for your abs, posture, etc., but what I didn't hear is how much fun it can be when combined with Pandora radio. Bounce wit it, lean wit it, rock wit it... and I do.

Not going to lie, my back was hurting for the first few days and I've caught myself leaning on my desk a few too many times, but overall it was a great purchase. I've gotten many questions, weird stares, and plenty of laughs, but I'm not going to give up the ballin'... at least not until I wipe out, which has not happened... yet! Surprised if I do say so myself. There will absolutely be a blog post dedicated to my future ball wipeout because it's 110% sure to happen. Fingers crossed there are no serious injuries, and more importantly, that no one sees it go down.

The Ball

take it or leave it: Scramble With Friends... download the app and thank me later. It's just as good as Words With Friends, if not better.

20Dozen Resos

Holy hell-o it has been quite awhile since I've paid a visit and done some writing. The hustle & bustle of the holidays took over and apparently blogging took a back seat. After all, this is my life. But I'm back! It's a new year with a fresh start, and more than ever, I'm really excited for the unknown of 20dozen... not entirely sure why, but I'm running with it!

I know many people who believe that having a new year's resolution is cliche and, quite frankly, really fucking pointless. I, on the other hand, give into 1 or a few each year. I can't help it. Call it cliche, but I think it's the perfect way to get excited and work towards, something/s in the new year. Can I confidently say that I've followed through on an entire year's redo? Absolutely not. But going 365 days with a resolution isn't going to win you any cookies. I think it's the journey that one goes through in trying to accomplish their resolution that really matters... a self-fulfilling goal that one hopes to become a better person for, if you will.

My 20dozen resos do not include any of the following: drink less, workout more, get healthier, or stop swearing. You may be thinking those would ideal resos for me, but you're wrong. I'm digging deep in 20dozen. Fuck the surface level bullshit resos that the majority of people go with every year. I'm not looking to set myself up for failure. Been there, done that. I've got 3 resolutions to tackle and exactly 360 days to make it happen.

Numero uno: Pay it forward. The plan is to do this at least once a month. I believe in karma and I'd much rather take the good over the bad, so if I can pay it forward, even in a small way, I would like to think that it's going to continue to benefit myself and others down the road. And I can only hope that me paying it forward encourages others to start doing the same.

Numero dos: Embrace spontaneity. Sounds simple, but as someone that loves to know what the plan is and always prefers to know what's going to happen next, spontaneity and I don't always see eye to eye. My plan, no pun intended, is to go with the flow, not worry about what's next, and see what life throws at me.

Number tres: Take more risks. Based off of my 2nd reso you can probably guess that being a planner and more of a 'by the book' kind of gal I don't go out of my way to take major risks. That doesn't mean I don't want to, I just let the fear takeover and, thus, avoid taking on any risks. Time to conquer some fears, take some risks, and hope for the best.

Big things... big, big things to come in 20dozen!



take it or leave it: the holiday season is now behind us, but this makes me smile... and secretly wish Christmas wasn't over yet. Wish I was there for this!

Committed

I've made a commitment. No, not that kind of commitment. I am still very single and there no ring near my fing. I have committed to something that I never thought I would... Singing. In public. With my own voice. Ordinarily I would have NEVER, I repeat, NEVER said yes to such an insane thing, however one of my best friends asked me to sing at her wedding. How does one say no to that? Exactly. You don't. So here I am committed to singing in my best friend's wedding and not-so-silently freaking out about it.

In the midst of the 'holy shit I just committed to this' thought process I've been going through I've also realized that I need to look at this as a great experience to go through. I mean, how many people get asked to sing at their best friend's wedding? My guess isn't that too many. Will it be a huge challenge for me to get over this funny thing called stage fright? Abso-fucking-lutely. But I'm feeling excited and extremely honored to have been asked to do this. So... This. Is. Happening! When I commit to something I go big or I go home, and I can assure you I will not be going home on this one. 

Now back to the stage fright. Here's the deal - I have admitted (thanks to this blog) that I can carry a tune, but the reason I don't own up to it is because I have insanely horrible terrible stage fright. The only times I've been able to get up on a stage and sing in front of people was at my grade school music concerts and a few drunken college nights singing karaoke at Fiesta Mexican. Singing Total Eclipse of the Heart always goes much better with a few gay guys and a pitcher of mango margaritas. True story. That happened on more Tuesday nights than I'd like to recall. And since those days are longggg gone, my options are limited to the following:

A. bucking up

B. taking voice lessons

C. trying karaoke... sober

D. all of the above. 

Must go with option D. Here's to hoping I don't royally mess up and drop an F bomb in God's house. That would be my luck. 

  

take it or leave it: Decorating gingerbread houses. Not just for kids... add a little competition to it and you've got 4 girls ready to rumble with frosting and candy. Naturally, the judge chose my house for first place! Far left... she's a looker!  

Snow Daze

I love snow. Many people make it very clear that they hate it and can't wait for spring to roll around, but I say to hell with you. I mean really, we're in Midwest, people! If you can't handle the cold, snow, or driving in it please get the F out. You make winter so much worse for those of us who actually enjoy it! Your constant complaints on Facebook and Twitter are not going to make the snow go away. Having grown up in the Chicago suburbs I quickly learned that one is required to adapt to winter and massive amounts of snow. All I ask is if you live here, please try to do the same. 

There is something so magical and perfect about watching a winter snowfall. It takes me back to my childhood... the days when I lived for a snow day. Nowadays that doesn't happen unless we get 2 feet of snow, but nonetheless, I love a great winter storm. Waking up and looking out the window with the hopes of seeing snow covered streets and trees is a priceless thing. That's a moment that makes my inner child come out and realize the endless list of fun you can have with some good snow. I promise you it can be fun for adults... it doesn't fall from the sky just for the kids... 

• Car sledding and/or snowboarding - slightly risky, yes, but it gives you a rush of adrenaline and a good laugh when someone wipes out. This is something only to be done in neighborhoods where the plows are last to come to... a major perk of my parents living where they do.

• Snowmobiling - literally did this everyday after school and on the weekends when we had 4 or more inches of snow when I was a kid. My best friend and I growing up were both lucky enough to have our own snowmobiles and big enough yards to tear up. We would build little jumps to go off of, pull each other on the sled, and when we were feeling risky we'd drive down the streets, which is illegal. Bad asses.

• Drunk sledding - you never seem to get cold while your drunk and sledding. And even better, if you wipe out hard it won't hurt until the following day. It's sort of amazing.

• Silence of the snow - have you ever walked outside after a fresh layer snow is on the ground and noticed how silent everything is around you? If you haven't, you should experience it. Quite peaceful. Every year I get all bundled up, snow pants and all, and head outside to lay in the snow for a few minutes. The snow absorbs the sounds around you and it's just you, the snow, and silence. Pure winter bliss. 

Even if you could never fathom doing such childish things as an adult, I would ask you to reconsider. I think it's really important for everyone to take a step back from reality and act like a kid again. It helps clear the mind and for a little bit and it will make you forget about the harsh realities in life. Try it. And equally as important, embrace the snow. You live in the Midwest. Get used it or go to Florida. 




take it or leave it: 

We Found Love In a Nail Salon

Have you ever been to a first date to a nail salon? Ya, me neither, but I definitely witnessed that happen last night. It started off completely different than it ended up. It started when a guy walked into Juko around 8pm and asked if there was time for a manicure. It was nearly empty in the place so Zach, the salon manager, had no choice but to tell him yes and told him which chair to sit in. The confident/cocky dude proceeded make it loud and clear that it wasn't for him, but for his 'wifey' who was parking the car. A few minutes later 'wifey' strutted in the door and popped a squat 2 chairs away from me. I tried to focus on the movie that was playing straight ahead and not focus on the awkward comments he kept whispering loudly saying to his eye candy. 

Nothing says romantic like a guy telling his wifey to pick out a nail polish color as sexy as she is... and yes, he actually said that. Melts my heart. My guess is that she picked OPI's 'Do You Think I'm Texy'. I went with Roadhouse Blues(balls). That's what I'm thinking ended up happening to him by the end of last night. Anywho, she picked a few sexy colors and let him choose the winner... how presh! They were served a glass of white wine and her manicure got underway. I continued to focus on the movie that had just started... "Something Borrow". I've never seen it, so I was fully engaged in what was happening on the tube and trying to avoid the catastrophe to my left. 

It was not until I clearly heard homeboy ask his wifey when she had her last good kiss. I couldn't help but perk up when he asked this. NOT because I was interested, but because I was confused beyond belief. Why would he ask his wifey such a dumb fucking question... well friends, it's cause she was not his wifey. In fact, she was far from it. They were on a first date. I'm not sure if I was just too stunned by the growing awkwardness of what was happening or just didn't hear her response, but next thing I know is I looked out of the corner of my eye and there was a full fledge makeout in progress. WHO DOES THAT? If you do that or have ever done that, please don't tell me because you will get judged... harshly. Couldn't have waited 15 more minutes til you got to the car? I was astonished... and completely lost from what was happening in the movie at that point. I was beyond mortified for the poor girl who was doing her nails... she was just about ready to go home for the night when wifey and homeboy waltzed in at 8pm for a makeout manicure sesh. Hope she got a great spit... I mean tip. 

Simple rule: If you want to get a manicure, don't interrupt with a makeout. If you want to makeout, don't come in for a manicure. 

Word to the wise for the future tall, dark, and handsome that walks into my life... if you call me 'wifey' and/or take me to get a manicure on our first date don't even consider calling for a second date. Grow some balls, have some manners, and be a gentleman. Not hard.  

take it or leave it: A few festive words to live by...

 

Holiday Gluttony

Tis the season to lose any type of workout routine I was in and pack on the lbs. Seriously, nothing grinds my gears more… except for fluffing the branches on the Christmas tree. It’s like why buy a winter coat when I can just eat my way to one. I believe whales refer to that as blubber. Infuriating, yet it could possibly happen. I constantly tell myself ‘come on Lizz, get it together and stick with it. You’ll regret it later when you’re sweating balls on the treadmill.’ The battle never ends, I tell ya. What is so hard about sticking to it? Well, let me tell you.

First there’s Thanksgiving… nothing says obese American quite like Thanksgiving. We make it a patriotic duty to shove our faces with as much food as possible on that day and we’re proud of it. Sure, I’ll have a slice of pumpkin pie and pecan pie, oh and don’t forget the extra side of diabetes. I truly will never understanding eating to the point of being so full that one literally has to unbutton their pants. Am I guilty of this, yes. But that doesn’t make it right. It’s quite disturbing if you ask me.

It’s almost like there’s no turning back after Thanksgiving because then it’s full fledge holiday time. You have this party one day, a work party the next night, mix that with cocktails and hor d'oeuvres and your 1,500 calorie day just skyrocketed to 3,000 protruding calories. And naturally these parties happen to fall exactly at the time I would be working out… so there goes that days workout. #firstworldproblems. And then there’s your co-worker who brings in a huge tray of cookies because she was in the holiday spirit and got carried away with the sugar cookies and icing. How can one resist such perfect snowman cookies? I can’t.

And then once you think you’re in the clear after Christmas comes New Year’s Eve… why eat 1,500 calories when you can drink them? Isn’t that how you usually ring in the New Year? Makes for one hell of a hangover, and 9 times out of 10 it’s not worth it, but magically year after year I never seem to learn my lesson… except this year. Fingers crossed I actually stick with that.

If you’re in my (gravy) boat, you know that it’s no fun falling off the workout bandwagon, but it’s even less fun to try and get back on it once you’ve fallen. I truly do my best to make working out a priority even if I can only spare 20 minutes that day. Even when I think I’m too tired to work out some nights, I know I will regret not doing it at all just to get a little more sleep that night. So, as I sit here yawning and thinking about holiday Oreos I’m still going to go home and hit the mill tonight, sweat balls, and be much happier when I’m done. It’s worth it.

take it or leave it: Skinny Taste Go there. Love it. You’ll thank me. Some of the best recipes I’ve found in a long time. I’ve tried a good handful of recipes from this site and not one has disappointed.